Okay, so the other day I watched all episodes of Three Wives, One Husband on Netflix. If you haven't seen it yet, I definitely recommend watching it after reading this email haha.
What fascinated me so much was that in this particular family, Abel and his three sister-wives Suzie, Marina, and Beth, reminded me so much of my relationship... with myself.
To the left, you've got Suzie. The happy-go-lucky first wife believes that everything will work out in the end. If a challenge comes along, there's a lesson to be learned and growth to be experienced.
Next to her, we've got the youngest and most recent wife, Marina. She is crazy jealous and really struggles to share her husband with the other two wives. She will text him constantly, pick fights, ruin one-on-one time for him and the other wives. It's a mess.
And to the right, we've got Beth. Poor Beth. She's the one who is absolutely miserable because of how Marina acts. Her anniversary with her husband Abel was ruined because Marina was fighting with him all evening through text. She just cannot stand Marina's grumpiness, which makes Beth super grumpy too.
This is a perfect representation of the brain of a Grumpy Girlfriend.
There's the one part that "knows better". She loves her partner and knows that all the drama going on is unproductive and leads nowhere.
The other part creates all the drama and freaks out about everything. It just can't help but see things as threats to the relationship all the time.
And then there's the part that hates the drama part. The part that judges and gets frustrated and annoyed that the freakouts happen to begin with. And this just layers on even more suffering.
The thing is...
When living with a mind that includes all three personalities, our primitive brain is always going to be a Marina and our prefrontal cortex is going to be a Suzie.
But, do we really need Beth to join the party? All she does is judge and complain. How does she contribute?
Well, we definitely want to have compassion for Beth. It sucks having to share the hubby with Grumpy-Marina. But Beth is the key to growth here.
She's the one who's miserable.
She's the one who complains.
She's the one who knows that we can't go on like this.
And if you can relate to having a Suzie and a Marina in your brain, I'm pretty sure you've got a Beth in there somewhere as well who is dying to get some help. It's time we listen to Beth and give her what she needs.
Click the link below to schedule a free consultation with me to discuss what your sister-wives-situation looks like in your head. We'll figure out how to solve this conflict, together.
Apply for a free consultation: https://www.katrinberndt.com/apply